No La huv Lost

The one thing I love about the Web is that because of it, we’ve learned so much about what it means to really want to say something that, ultimately, could hurt someone else’s feelings, so we refrain. We show a little self-control. We’ve learned that those little jibes we make at people that seem hilarious at the time can have long-lasting and serious consequences.

Take the Playboy bunny who is currently under police investigation for taking a picture of a naked 70-year-old woman in a gym and posting it—she says unintentionally—to her public Snapchat account with a caption that led one to believe she was less than impressed by the person’s physique. She didn’t realize that photographing naked people is actually a crime, and now she could face jail time for her moment of “I’m young and sexy and can make fun of whomever I want” snarkiness. It’s a lesson well heeded, and whenever I have those moments, I think about what I say or post twice.

And I’ve thought about what I’m going to say next more than that, and I still just have to post it.
There is a singer that, even though I like this person’s music, I can’t stand their singing. As I’m driving along in my car, a song will come on the radio by this particular singer, and even though I like everything about the song, it makes me cringe because this person just, well, warbles. I mean WARBLES. Oh my God, it sounds like this person is seriously just making fun of those singers of yesteryear whose “Best of” and “Song Styings of” albums are all the rage on late night commercials, except the singers of yesteryear can actually sing.

In the most recent song I heard from this person, one of the words is “love” (changed to protect the identity of the singer), and this person sings it as “la huv.” I swear that it’s an intentional affront to the singer’s fans who apparently don’t know a hack when they hear one. It’s almost like the singer is saying, “Ha! I can sing like a 10-year-old child with laryngitis doing the worst imitation of Barbara Streisand ever and they’re so dumb they’ll keep buying my music.”

It’s maddening to love the songs and groan at the singer. How is that possible? How did this person ever make it this far in the music industry? Why can’t someone else be singing these songs? I didn’t name the singer in this post because I know my opinion is just one of millions, and apparently those millions like their music with a little bit of kitschy, breathy, melodramatic whisper-shrieking. Also, I’d feel bad if the singer read this because I know how I’d feel if someone said the same thing about my verbal abilities, which a zillion fans do not “la huv.” Even famous music people have feelings, and even though some choose to sing about them even though they can’t hold a note, it’s not my place to call them out. But it does feel good to get this off my chest.

So what about you? Do you have one song (or more) that you love but you can’t stand the way the singer sings it? Am I the only one? I can’t be. Please do share in the comments. Until then, happy reading!